14 March 2025

Frequently Asked Questions About Your EMDR Safe Place

Safe space, safe place, calm place. Coping with distress during trauma recovery

Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) therapy was developed by Francine Shapiro. It is a powerful approach to healing from trauma and other distressing experiences. Finding your ‘safe place’ for calm and safety is an essential step to deal with the mind and body reactions that take place during EMDR sessions. 

TL;DR

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Safe place exercise: part of the second phase of EMDR protocol

A key element in the preparation phase (Phase 2) of EMDR therapy is establishing a safe (calm) place.

The safe space helps you feel more secure and regulated throughout the treatment process.

Here are some common questions about the EMDR safe place:

🧠 What is EMDR safe place?

The EMDR safe place is also known as the calm place or the safe space. It is a positive state or image that you create in your mind. The idea is you can access it to promote feelings of calm, safety, peace, or any other positive sensation.

It can be an imagined or real location, and the goal is that you take a moment to create a vivid sensory experience associated with positive feelings. Some clients in trauma recovery prefer the term calm place because some clients who have experienced significant trauma may find it difficult to imagine a completely "safe" space.

🧠 Is the safe place a physical or imaginary location in EMDR therapy?

The safe (calm) place can be either a physical or imaginary location.

Imagine your calm place and notice how you feel

You can choose a real place where they have felt secure and peaceful, or you can think of a place, an entirely new, imaginary sanctuary where you feel calm or safe. The most important aspect is that the place gives you positive feelings and sensations. For veterans or military personnel, the use of a "secure" place might be more appropriate. In therapy, you and I are trying to create a mental refuge for you to find calmness and emotional healing after revisiting traumatic memories.

What are the benefits of establishing an EMDR safe place?

Establishing a safe (calm) place offers several benefits in EMDR therapy:

The safe space is a container exercise that acts as coping mechanism

  • The calming imagery prepares you for processing traumatic events by providing a resource for stabilization.
  • It's a technique clients can use to manage dysfunctional material and elevated stress levels whenever they feel overwhelmed.
  • It functions as a temporary state change strategy, allowing you to shift out of the overwhelming sensations and emotions that may occur during trauma therapy.
  • Its serenity aids in closing down a session, especially if it is incomplete
  • It is a powerful tool that helps you to maintain dual awareness during reprocessing.
  • It is a coping tool to equalize or stabilize your distress in session if the information that emerges is too emotionally disruptive.

Bilateral stimulation

  • It introduces the client to bilateral stimulation (BLS) in a comfortable way before it is used with disturbing material.

  • It serves as a temporary rest or break between sets of bilateral stimulation (e.g. eye movements or butterfly tapping) during processing.

🧠 What are some techniques to strengthen the safe place in EMDR therapy?

Several techniques can help strengthen the safe (calm) place. You can try some of the following steps.

Guided imagery:

Your psychotherapist can guide you to vividly imagine the sights, sounds, smells, tastes, textures and other specific aspects of your chosen place.

Bilateral Stimulation (BLS):

Pairing bilateral stimulation (such as eye movements, taps, or tones) with the visualization of the safe (calm) place can help strengthen the positive associations. I like to begin tapping with slow and short sets to help clients feel they are in a calm place.

Sensory focus:

I encourage my clients to focus on the pleasant sensations in their body while imagining the place of their choice.

Self-cuing:

You can choose a cue word associated with your safe (calm) place and use it to quickly access the feeling of your place.

Practice:

If you become my client, I will encourage you to practice accessing your safe (calm) place between sessions. I get as feedback that my clients find this exercise helps building resilience in dealing with major and minor annoyances. 

🧠 What are some creative ways to personalize the safe place in EMDR therapy?

You can personalize your safe (calm) place in many creative ways:

Adding specific details:

Include unique elements, such as a favorite object, a comforting presence (real or imagined), or a particular time of day

Incorporating sensory experiences:

Focus on engaging all the senses to make the place more vivid and real

Creating an internal space:

If you struggle with external safe places, creating an internal "sacred space" can be an alternative, a place within yourself where no one else can intrude. This internal space can be grounded using mindfulness techniques like imagining tree roots connecting to the earth.

Choosing a place that embodies a feeling:

Instead of a specific location, you might focus on a feeling, such as "a place of courage" or "a peaceful feeling," and visualize a setting that represents that feeling.

🧠 What are the differences between the safe place and the target memory in EMDR?

The safe (calm) place and the target memory in EMDR are fundamentally different:

Safe Place:

This is a positive and resourcing state or image created to evoke feelings of safety, calm, and well-being. It is a resource to help manage distress.

Target Memory:

This is a disturbing memory or experience that is the focus of EMDR processing. It is associated with negative emotions, cognitions, and physical sensations.

Why therapists advice to use a Safe Space in EMDR sessions

The goal of processing is to reduce the disturbance associated with this memory. The safe (calm) place is a tool used to prepare for and manage the emotional intensity that may arise when processing the target memory. It provides a point of reference for safety and regulation.

🧠 Is it necessary to have a physical safe place in EMDR therapy?

While it helps, it is not necessary to have a physical safe place in the real world that corresponds to the EMDR safe (calm) place. The safe (calm) place is a mental construct, and its effectiveness relies on the client's ability to vividly imagine it and experience positive feelings associated with it. It can be a completely imaginary location.

🧠 How does the safe place help in regulating emotions during EMDR processing?

The safe (calm) place helps in regulating emotions during EMDR processing in several ways:

  • It provides a quick and accessible way to reduce distress if the emotional intensity becomes overwhelming during the processing of a target memory. During a session I can instruct you to briefly return to your safe (calm) place to regain equilibrium.

  • It helps to shift your state from the focus on the disturbing memory to a more present-focused and functional state of mind.

  • It can be used as a self-soothing technique both during and between therapy sessions.

🧠 How does the safe place impact the processing of traumatic memories in EMDR?

The safe (calm) place indirectly impacts the processing of traumatic memories:

  • By providing a sense of safety and stability, it allows you to engage more fully in the processing of distressing memories without becoming overwhelmed.

  • It helps you to maintain dual awareness, being present in the moment while also engaging with the traumatic memory.

  • It can be used to close incomplete processing sessions by helping you return to a calmer state.

  • Many people find that over time the positive feelings associated with the safe space can begin to push away the negative emotions linked to the traumatic memory.

🧠 How does the safe place concept align with other therapeutic modalities?

The concept of a safe place or secure base aligns with principles in other therapeutic modalities:

Attachment Theory:

The safe (calm) place can be seen as an internal secure base that the client can access for comfort and reassurance, similar to the role of a secure attachment figure.

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT):

While EMDR differs from CBT in its direct approach to processing trauma, the safe (calm) place can be considered a form of imagery and relaxation technique, which are also used in CBT for managing anxiety and distress.

Internal Family Systems (IFS):

The safe (calm) place can be a space where the client's "Self" can be accessed and where different "parts" can find a sense of peace and integration.

🧠 Are there specific instructions for clients to maintain their safe place between sessions?

Yes, I like to give my clients specific instructions  to maintain their safe (calm) place between sessions:

Practice regularly: 

I encourage you to practice visualizing your safe space daily, focusing on the sensory details and the positive feelings it evokes.

Use the cue word:

You can use your cue word to quickly access the feeling of your calm place whenever you feel stressed or triggered.

Notice its effects:

Pay attention to how accessing your safe (calm) place affects your emotions and physical sensations.

Use it when needed:

I will remind you to use your safe place whenever you experience even mild levels of disturbance between sessions. I also explain that it might be less effective during high levels of disturbance, especially when you are first learning the technique.

🧠 Can the safe place be revisited during EMDR processing?

Yes, the safe space can and often is revisited during EMDR processing. 

I often instruct my clients to return to their safe (calm) place:

  • As a brief break if the processing of a traumatic memory becomes too intense. 

  • At the end of a set of tapping or other bilateral stimulation before continuing with the processing.

  • To help stabilize you if unexpected or highly disturbing material emerges.

  • As part of the closure phase of a session to ensure you leave feeling grounded and calm.

🧠 How do you create a safe place in EMDR?

Identify a place

To create a safe (calm) place in EMDR, you identify a place, real or imagined, where you feel safe and calm.

I may guide you by suggesting examples like a mountaintop, a beach, or beside a stream.

Focus on what you see, hear, smell and feel

Once you have a place in mind, you focus on the sensory details: what sights, sounds, smells, and even tactile sensations are present.

The goal is to create a vivid mental image associated with positive feelings.

For some, a calm or sacred space

For those who struggle with the concept of a "safe" place due to significant trauma, creating a "calm" place or an internal "sacred space" may be more helpful. The "sacred space" is an internal refuge that you create within yourself.

Tapping the positive association in place

I use bilateral stimulation (BLS), usually via the technique called butterfly tapping, to strengthen the positive association.

🧠 How important is the safe place concept in EMDR treatment?

The safe place concept is very important in EMDR treatment. 

It serves as a stabilizing resource that: 

  • prepares you for processing traumatic events,

  • provides a temporary break during intense processing,

  • helps manage emotional distress,

  • aids in closing down sessions.

Dual awareness

It also helps ensure that you can maintain dual awareness – being present while processing past memories.

Bilateral stimulation

Establishing a safe (calm) place also introduces you to bilateral stimulation (BLS) in a comfortable way before it is used with distressing material.

🧠 How can EMDR safe place help in trauma processing?

The EMDR safe place supports trauma processing by providing a sense of security that allows you to engage with distressing memories without becoming overwhelmed.

You can return to your safe (calm) place as a brief break if the emotional intensity rises during processing.

It facilitates a shift in state from the traumatic memory to a more present and grounded state.

Over time, the positive feelings associated with your safe (calm) place can help to counterbalance the negative emotions linked to the traumatic memory, contributing to the reprocessing and reduction of emotional impact.

🧠 Can the safe place be used outside of EMDR sessions for relaxation?

Yes, the safe place can be used outside of EMDR sessions for relaxation and self-soothing. 

You can practice visualizing your safe place regularly, focusing on the sensory details and positive feelings. 

Using your cue word, if you have one, can help you quickly access the feeling of your safe place whenever you feel stressed or triggered. 

🧠 Are there specific guidelines for developing an EMDR safe place?

Here are some guidelines I give to my clients for developing an EMDR safe space:

Identify a place:

Choose a real or imagined location where you feel or could feel safe and calm.

Engage your senses:

Focus on the sights, sounds, smells, tastes, and tactile sensations of your chosen place to make it vivid.

Establish a cue word:

Choose a word that you can use to quickly access the feeling of your safe place.

Practice:

Regularly visualize your safe place and use your cue word.

Consider alternatives:

If a traditional "safe" place is difficult, explore creating a "calm" place or an internal "sacred space". The "sacred space" can be grounded using imagery like tree roots connecting to the earth.

Be patient:

Developing a strong safe place may take practice.

🧠 How can one access their safe place during distressing EMDR sessions?

During a distressing EMDR session, you can access your safe (calm) place by focusing on your mental image of the place and recalling the associated sensory details and positive feelings.

Your therapist may also guide you to use your cue word.

Safe space as calm haven during abreaction

If the distress becomes overwhelming during processing (abreaction), your therapist may instruct you to briefly pause the processing and return to your safe (calm) place to regain equilibrium.

Enter safe space using bilateral stimulation

Find out how to give yourself a butterfly hug. Butterfly tapping is a form of bilateral stimulation (BLS) that can be used while focusing on your safe place to help you shift your state.

🧠 How does the safe place contribute to the overall success of EMDR therapy?

The safe place contributes significantly to the overall success of EMDR therapy by providing a foundation of safety and stability. This allows you to engage more fully in the processing of traumatic memories without being overwhelmed by intense emotions.

It enhances your ability to maintain dual awareness, which is crucial for effective processing. The safe place also serves as a self-regulation tool both during and between sessions, promoting a greater sense of control, self-efficacy and resilience throughout the therapeutic process

🧠 How can the safe place be utilized for grounding techniques in EMDR therapy?

When you focus on the sensory details of your safe place, it helps to bring you into the present moment and connect you with your body and surroundings.

You can further enhance this by incorporating other grounding exercises within your safe place, such as imagining feeling the ground beneath you or focusing on your breath.

The "sacred space" exercise also explicitly incorporates grounding by having you imagine roots connecting you to the earth.

🧠 How can the safe place be integrated into the EMDR reprocessing phases?

The safe (calm) place is primarily established in the Preparation Phase (Phase 2). And yes, you can (and probably should) use it throughout the EMDR reprocessing phases (Phases 3-6).

  • It can be used as a stabilizing break during the Desensitization Phase (Phase 4) if the emotional intensity becomes too high.

  • In the Installation Phase (Phase 5), focusing on the positive cognition within your safe place can help strengthen its association.

  • During the Body Scan (Phase 6), you can return to your safe place if you notice any residual disturbance.

  • Finally, it is crucial for Closure (Phase 7) to ensure you leave the session feeling grounded and calm.

If all those phases sound dizzying, don't worry. Your EMDR counselor will guide you through the process.

🧠 Can the safe place change throughout the EMDR therapy sessions?

Yes, the safe place can change and evolve throughout your EMDR therapy sessions.

As you progress in therapy and your needs change, you might find that your initial safe place no longer feels as effective, or you may discover new places (real or imagined) that resonate more strongly with feelings of safety and calm.

You and your therapist can work together to adapt or create a new safe place that better meets your current needs. Similarly, if your initial safe place is "intruded" upon by distressing material, you may need to develop an alternative place.

🧠 What are some common misconceptions about the EMDR safe place?

Some common misconceptions about the EMDR safe place include:

It has to be a real, physical location:

As discussed, it can be entirely imaginary

It will completely eliminate all distress during processing:

While it helps manage distress, it won't necessarily eliminate it entirely.

It's a sign of weakness to need a safe place:

It is a resourceful tool that helps facilitate effective processing

Once created, it will always feel the same:

As mentioned, it can evolve and change.

🧠 Is the safe place a temporary or permanent resource in EMDR treatment?

The safe place is intended to be a permanent resource that you can continue to use both during and after EMDR treatment.

It becomes a self-soothing tool that you can access whenever you need to feel calmer and more grounded.

While the specific details of your safe place might evolve, the ability to create and access such an internal resource is a lasting benefit of EMDR therapy.

🧠 Can EMDR safe place be used for anxiety treatment?

Yes, the EMDR safe (calm) place can be a helpful tool in anxiety treatment, even outside of processing specific traumatic memories.

By regularly accessing your safe place and using your cue word, you can reduce feelings of anxiety and promote relaxation in everyday situations.

It serves as a self-regulation strategy to manage anxious thoughts and physical sensations.

🧠 What role does the safe place play in EMDR processing?

The safe place plays a crucial supportive role in EMDR processing.

  • It acts as a resource for stabilization, allowing you to tolerate and process distressing memories more effectively.

  • It provides a mental sanctuary to return to if the emotional intensity becomes overwhelming, helping to prevent you from becoming flooded.

  • It also facilitates a shift in state between processing and a more grounded present moment, which is important for maintaining equilibrium

🧠 Can the safe place evolve and adapt based on the client's needs in EMDR?

Yes, the safe place can definitely evolve and adapt based on your needs throughout EMDR therapy.

As you progress and gain more insight, the qualities you seek in your safe place might change. You might want to add new elements, shift the focus to different sensory experiences, or even create entirely new safe places that better resonate with your current emotional state and therapeutic goals.

Your therapist will support you in this ongoing process of tailoring your safe place to your evolving needs.

🧠 How does EMDR safe place work in therapy?

In therapy, the EMDR safe place works by providing you with a reliable internal resource for managing emotional distress.

Preparation phase

During the preparation phase, you learn to create and access this place, often with the aid of bilateral stimulation (BLS) to strengthen the positive associations.

Reprocessing phase

During reprocessing, you can use your safe place as a brief respite from intense emotions, allowing you to continue processing without being overwhelmed.

Closing sessions

It also helps in closing sessions by ensuring you leave in a more grounded and stable state.

Outside and after EMDR therapy

The ability to access your safe place empowers you with a self-soothing tool that you can also use outside of sessions to manage anxiety and stress.

🧠 How can one enhance the sense of safety in their EMDR safe place?

You can enhance the sense of safety in your EMDR safe place by:

Making it more vivid:

Engage all your senses to create a detailed and immersive experience

Adding elements of protection:

You can imagine barriers or protective features that enhance the feeling of security

Incorporating positive presences:

Imagine comforting figures (real or imagined) being with you in your safe place

Focusing on positive sensations:

Pay attention to any pleasant physical sensations you associate with your safe place

Practicing regularly:

The more you practice accessing your safe place, the stronger and more reliable it will become.

🧠 Are there any risks associated with the safe place concept in EMDR?

While generally a helpful resource, there are a few potential considerations regarding the safe (calm) place:

Initial distress:

For some people, initially developing a safe place might be disturbing or increase distress. If this occurs, together we will try to develop an alternate safe place or use other stabilization techniques.

Avoidance:

Some therapists think that if you use the safe place excessively to avoid processing distressing material, it can hinder progress.

Through my Internal Family Systems lens, I see avoidance as an important, positive message.

If you find you cannot leave your safe place, that is a powerful way of your protectors telling you and me that you are not ready yet for processing. We will work together with your parts to enhance your and their sense of safety before we continue delving into your traumatic memories.

Intrusion:

Sometimes, distressing images or thoughts might intrude into your safe place. If this happens, you may need to work with your therapist to think of another safe place that feels more secure. It does not have to be a real place. You can create a place that feels safe in your imagination.

🧠 Now that you've come this far

Let's get in touch. I will send you my list of EMDR Safe Space FAQs in a neat pdf.

Michiel Bosman MD PhD

EMDR- and IFS-trained Psychiatrist

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Michiel Bosman MD PhD

EMDR- and IFS-trained Psychiatrist

 

 

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